A Deep Conversation - Part II

Posted on Fri Oct 4th, 2024 @ 5:34pm by Lieutenant JG Zai & Lieutenant Lanna Alexander

1,235 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: Lacertae Mortis
Location: Mess Hall | USS Arcadia
Timeline: Just before Zai got Sick

Previously on A Deep Conversation….


"This...family. In some ways it is difficult for me to understand. My own family was...different."

Lanna nodded. “I’ll tell you what, why don’t you join us for dinner one evening? I don’t think Jarin would mind, it would give you a chance to experience what our family relationships are like.”

"I will think about it." He shrugged. "It's the best I can do."

“That’s fine, it was just an idea.” Lanna offered a warm smile.

"I think we've talked enough. How about we eat now?"

Lanna nodded. “Good idea, I’m starved!” She grinned as her attention turned to her food.


And now, the conclusion….

ON:

They got their food and settled in for the meal. "So tell me more about Betazed. What was the planet like? What was it like growing up there?"

Lanna paused eating and sat back for a moment. “Betazed is a lush, beautiful world, Its gravity and atmosphere are comparable to Earth, and water covers 78 percent of the planet's surface.” She smiled as she recalled her home world. “There are five continents and hundreds of islands. The mountain peaks of multicolored crystal catch the rays of the Betazoid sun, revealing layers of color upon the landscape below. The sky is blue with pink clouds, and there is a lot of farmland on Betazed, with many cities devoted to philosophical studies.” She paused. “I could go on and on...” Lanna grinned. “Growing up there was amazing, we don’t fear sharing our thoughts and feelings, we communicate using our telepathy without fear of being punished for it. I miss not being able to use my telepathy openly here.”

"In terms of speaking Telepathically?"

Lanna nodded. “Telepaths have to be cautious amongst non-telepaths.”

"Indeed I can see that. It's interesting my people do not possess that kind of telepathy. We are empaths and we can communicate but by sending images...and that takes a great deal of strength." Zai took a sip of his drink.

“The same applies to telepathy” Lanna shifted to make herself more comfortable in her seat. “It takes a lot of focus and concentration so it’s physically draining.”

"Fascinating." Zai was quiet a moment as he seemed to think things through. "I....must issue an apology to you counselor."

Lanna gave Zai a curious look. “An apology? What for?”

"I think that I misjudged you from the start. Getting to know you now my opinion has changed a lot."

“I...” Lanna paused. “Sorry I wasn’t expecting that.” She smiled. “Thank you Zai, that means a lot.”

He gave a nod. "May I ask a personal question?"

Lanna nodded. “Please do.”

"You are married yes?"

Lanna nodded her head. “Very happily married.”

"How did you know that your partner was someone you loved?" Zai turned red a little. "It is not something I am familiar with."

Lanna smiled. “Jarin and I worked together for a little while, we always got along well together. I guess it just...happened. I looked at him one day and just knew he was the man for me. Let your heart guide you Zai, it sounds corny but you’ll know when you find the right woman.”

Zai, who was in the process of drinking, swallowed wrong and coughed. His body shook as he tried to expel the water. It took a moment but he got himself under control. "Um...yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck mirroring a habit he'd picked up from Fang. "So you said you looked at him and you knew he was the umm person for you how did you know what does...it feel like?"

Lanna had noticed Zai’s uncomfortable response but didn’t say anything. “That’s a little harder to explain” she smiled. “For me every time I was around Jarin, I just felt happier. He made me smile, made me feel like there was nothing I couldn’t do. I also missed it when we weren’t together, I still do even though we’re both aboard the ship.”

"Hm.." He said. "Can I ask you another personal question?"

Lanna smiled and nodded. “Ask away...”

"What is the difference between love and hate? What does...forgiveness feel like?" Zai thought a moment. "Also I have a hypothetical situation."

Lanna was surprised by the series of questions but was happy to answer them nonetheless. “The difference between love and hate? There’s a stark difference but I guess at first it wouldn’t be easy to distinguish. Trust me you’ll know the difference, hate is a dark emotion, but love and forgiveness help change that. You start to question whether you really feel hate anymore, or whether you are more willing to forgive instead. It’s...hard to explain.” She paused. “What about your hypothetical situation?”

Zai processed what she said. "I see." He was quiet a long moment. "So if someone betrayed you and you wished to... see them as hurt and upset as you were but then the thought of seeing them this way is....difficult to bear what is that?"

“Then I’d say your priorities are changing. That instead of the said person being someone you hate, that someone is becoming someone you want to forgive.”

"I see."

"The Hypothetical. Your husband, you know who he is, what he is like, the person that he is. If down the line you found out he was another person how would you feel?"

“I guess I would feel hurt, and angry.” Lanna paused. “But I’d want to try and understand why he hadn’t told me before. To try and understand better.”

Zai was silent a moment. "I have one more question for you. How do you distinguish between brotherhood and deep friendship and a romantic love."

Lanna offered a smile she was starting to get a much better picture. “Brotherhood and deep friendship has a different... feel than love. Yes, you care deeply for a brother or close friend, but if that friendship becomes love then it’s a deeper connection. You may feel jealousy when seeing them enjoying themselves with someone else, your feel better in their presence than you do when they’re not around. They make you smile...” she paused. “Am I giving you what you’re looking for?”

He looked at her. "I think I am starting to understand." He paused. "Um...thank you for indulging my curiosity." He shrugged. "The world is a complicated place." Then he wondered if he'd covered his tracks. "This is purely research, of course. I wish to understand the world around me." He nervously scratched his neck.

Lanna was feeling a whole host of mixed emotions from Zai, but she wasn’t going to pry into what he obviously wasn’t ready to talk about. “That’s okay, I’m always happy to help.”

He smiled. "Enough of such depressing things. Let us eat." He turned back to his food. The rest of the meal was spent talking and making small talk yet in his soul Zai felt like something had shifted. A fear and sadness and worry settled over him that he could not shake.

Digging into her food Lanna couldn’t help but wonder just what was going on, no doubt she’d find out soon enough.

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